Chucking
the ball at another player, trash talking, holding jerseys, and shoving may not
always be considered sportsmanlike conduct; however, each is still accepted as tolerable
actions among players on the basketball court. Some would say it is all just
part of the game. It seems that someone forgot to tell Rutger’s Mike Rice that he
was definitely not in the game or even listed among the names on the players’
roster. It actually might have been helpful during his team’s practice, when he
began his derogatory tirades and childish kicking, if someone would have reminded
him that there was a “Coach” in front of his name.
It
is common knowledge that college basketball coaches desire and compete all year
for an invite to participate in the NCAA tournament each spring, Yet, this
coach was not just enticed by the lure of March Madness, but seemed to aspire
to February Fits, April Aggression, and May Meltdowns. 
If these videos had not been
released by ESPN’s Outside the Lines, one must wonder how long this “coach”
would have been allowed by Rutger’s University to berate, belittle, and accost
“his” players. After all, the Athletic Director Tim Pernetti has had a copy of
these videos in his possession for several months. So, it’s not surprising that
Pernetti now admits that he probably should have done more concerning these
allegations. Oh, really? Pernetti has discovered, unfortunately, a little too late
for him – and these ball players – that when one makes excuses for someone who merits
absolutely no job security, you usually end up losing your job too. Perhaps he
will learn something during his deserved unemployment and will have a desire to
look out for – and protect – the right people in the future.
The sports’ headlines and news
programs are all abuzz with their take on Mike Rice. On April 6, Salt Lake
Tribune columnist Gordon Monson asked the question many have wondered after
viewing these abusive videos, “How many Mike Rices are out there coaching our
kids?” On the following day, USA Today answered the question with their
headline, “Mike Rice not alone in abuse, just caught.” Sadly, I agree.
The larger question is why, oh why,
do we tolerate this behavior among adults who are given the responsibility to
guide, teach, direct, and instruct our children. We would never allow a teacher
in a classroom setting to drop the f-bomb at will, but very few adults bat an
eye when it is yelled in the face of a player on the sidelines of a game. That
type of behavior has become commonplace among coaches and widely accepted as
part of the game. My son’s high school basketball coach was heard using that
word during a game, and no one questioned him.
In fact, that coach was quite fluent
in colorful language and freely shared his skills. The line my son heard most
often was”&*#% Bryson! Catch the #@% - &$#% ball!” I should probably be
grateful that my son did not find that blankity-blank ball making a point-blank
bee line for his head – courtesy of his irritated coach.
Often parents – and I am one of them
– have feared it will hurt their child’s chances on the field if they speak up,
or perhaps, we might worry that our actions will cause more abuse for the kids
during practice. We definitely have given too much authority and power to the
coaches, and in turn, we have left our children defenseless.
Just viewing the complete
submissiveness of each player as Rice shoved, grabbed, kicked, threw balls, and
verbally attacked them made my stomach queasy. And then when some of the
players publically defended him, I thought my head my actually explode. I wondered how and why they thought any of
this behavior was okay.
On the one hand, we desire compassion
for our children and have national campaigns to prevent bullying in schools and
on the playground, but when there is a coach in front of an individual’s name, we
condone their intimidation methods all in the name of motivation, toughness,
and winning. It is hard to have it both ways.
I say that we have enough self-centered,
name calling, jerks in the world. Let us not raise another generation of Mike
Rices because we believe it is more important for our children to be tough,
aggressive athletes than kind human beings.
Coach is a title we automatically respect,
but those who warrant that admiration are the ones who teach discipline and
resilience by example. After all, how can we expect young athletes to show
self-control if their coach cannot. Thankfully, not every coach is a Mike Rice.
There are many who understand that when they are called coach, a young athlete
regards them as a wise and trusted mentor.
Next year, let’s hope the Madness in
March simply refers to Cinderella stories, buzzer beaters, and that one
glorious shining moment, and if any frustration is involved, it is towards your
mate and his or her bracket and not a misguided, potty-mouthed, fit-throwing,
angry-eyed, little man.
